The Breakdown: What Type of Woman Are You?

Introducing the Rescuer!!!

Rescuer Anthem: 'Clean up Woman'

Rescuing and fixing your man will make you feel indespensable and secure in your belief that as long as he needs you, he'll always love you too. But take a closer look and you'll spot the serious side effects of this safety-seeking love substitute. Rescuing and fixing always leave the Rescuer feeling:

-Alone. He will soak up the goodies, but never change his ways, and never manage to give back as much as you give out. Or he will soak up the goodies, get fixed and walk away from the woman he "needs" towards the one he wants.

- Resented. Your fixing will eventually make him feel needy and dependent, so he'll reject, ignore, or show no appreciation for your efforts.

- Exhausted. He will become addicted to your rescuing and fixing, and progress to demanding more and more of it--- ultimately more than you can possibly give.

The above are excerpts from pages 29-30 of the book How to Love a Black Man written by Dr. Ronn Elmore

The Locker Room

We hope everyone had a wonderful Thankgiving but now it's time to get back to Cupid's Reality!!!

    CC sat down with four professional atheletes and I must say Houston ladies have made quite the name for themselves in the world of atheletes. These ballers say that atheletes know to hide their wallets when they come to Houston! That's right ladies, Houston women have the reputation of being GOLD DIGGERS!!!! These hot atheletes say they know a gold digger from a mile away and Houston is their nest. On the brighter side, They did mention that New York, California and Houston have some of the most beautful women in the U.S.A. but when it comes to handing out the best body award....Houston wins hands down!!!! So to summarize this interview: Houston women are beautiful with the bodies of greek goddesses but you have to pay to play! Now I must say, I've witnessed quite a few "opportunist" in Houston and beautiful ones at that! But don't put us in a box fellas there are some good ones out here as well!!!

Cupid's Proverb

"We ignore those who adore us & adore those who ignore us."

                                                                                                          -Tony Henry

Men...Want to know How to Keep Her Attention?!?!

Cupid's Cousin really wants to help the men step their game up. If you follow our 5 tips.... we guarantee results:

#5: Don't be too friendly, ugh
- Well, if you discuss topics that friends discuss, then she will classify you as a friend. Yes, relationships should grow into full-fledged partnerships, but this is not so at the beginning. And if this isn't enough, she will tell you stories about all of the other men she likes and is pursuing.

#4: Keep her guessing
- Women like mystery. Now, CC is not saying that you should lie to them, nor are we saying that you should play games, but you should leave something hidden. Feed her a little at a time, keep her guessing!

#3: Do NOT make the first move
- So, show some interest -- this is the bait after all -- but keep your cards to your chest instead of slamming your two-of-a-kind on the table. Who knows? You may end up with a full house if you're patient.

#2: Be the Best you can be
- No, do not join the army, even though women like men in uniform. Rather, make sure you smell good, have fresh breath, are well-groomed, and look your best. Yes, some women do not care about looks, especially when your bank account swells to the seven-digits. However, the same way that men demand their women be good-looking, women demand and deserve the same. You have been warned.

#1: Manage her expectations
- Making her come to you is the easy part; keeping her is the real challenge. When you meet your dream woman, be honest with yourself and her: Do not portray yourself in a different light. Call it like it is and you will avoid headaches and misery down the road. Most importantly, she will see that you are being genuine, sincere and honest, and she will, therefore, want you by her side forever.

Damn! You smell good!

Here are some hot scents for you to smell your best! We all know that after Thanksgiving your are full, tired, and overwhelmed...but you always find time to par-tay!!! Make sure you don't smell like stuffing, so here are our suggestions:

Scent Type #1: Citrus/Green
Géranium pour Monsieur

Stay away from straight-up lemon, which can suggest furniture polish. Instead, try Géranium pour Monsieur. The geranium essence is boosted by mint, giving the impression of citrus without the cleaning-product hit, plus a green that's less lawn-mower clippings and more tender young grapevine.
50 ml, $135


 

Scent Type #2: Woodsy

La Nuit de L'Homme

If the men in your office still wear fat ties, consider the most conservative class in scentdom. YSL's newest version of L'Homme, La Nuit de L'Homme, has a subdued core structure with wood scents that read solid, burnt and aromatic spices that read clean. Very Edgey!
2 oz, $55


Smell More>>>

Sex Tips from Guys to Girls!

GET HIM RILED UP:

"I can't be the only guys who loves when a woman licks that soft patch of skin in front of my ears" -Jamie 23

"Wet your lips and moan that you can't wait to taste me" -Sam 22

"An ex came to bed in a soakin gwet white t-shirt. The sight was jaw dropping" -Nick 30

"Seeing a woman's lips glide over the neck of a beer bottle always make me think of her mouth on me" -Ty 21

FEISTY FOREPLAY:

"Reach into your panties and touch my lips with your wetness" -Troy 28

"My girl held my tongue in place with her teeth during a make out session while she tickled her own tongue. Electrifying!" -Howard 30

"When I put my finger in my girl, she inserted one of her digits too so I could feel our fingers together. Blow on it" -Beck 33

HANDS DOWN THERE DOMAIN

"Pull my pants down to my thighs. This limits my ability to move, and I'll feel like your captive" -Thad 27

"Brush your teeth with minty toothpaste before going down on me. It'll feel extra shivery" -Patrick 24

"While giving me oral, most chicks stop as soon as I reach my peak. But this one woman keep her lips on me through my climax. It was heavenly" -Chuck 27

"Rub my piece against your lips like you're applying lipstick" -Henry 23

MORE TO COME....

*we would like to thank http://www.cosmopolitan.com for this great info

Girl Talk

Okay Ladies don't shoot the messenger! We were asked by CC to summarize juicy conversations amongst the 6 of us and this is one of the topics we talked about the other night. Women DO CHEAT and we do it well!!!!! Men like to think of us as loyal lovers who will never step outside of the relationship and for the most part men are right. I think men cheat a lot more often but get caught because they are horrible liars or they can't keep up with their lie. It also seems like men give in to infidelity and for women infidelity gives in to us! Men tend to be weakened by temptation and cheat as a result. With women cheating is premeditated from the beginning to the end. Actually beginning to the end should be the title of this entry (hint to CC) because when a lie comes out the mouth of a woman she will keep it from the beginning to the end!!! One thing that works to the woman's advantage is the fact that the man she is cheating with probably knows all about her mate and couldn't care less. Men have more of a need to be discrete because the shit will hit the fan if he is “outed” on either side. Women are notorious for contacting the 'other woman' and setting things straight. We also talked about the advantage women have because men don't expect us to cheat thus they don't look for it. Well it's the counter for women our history says the next man will probably cheat just like the last so we look for it from the beginning to the end. Now men don't get worried actually 4 of the 6 of us don't cheat and have no desire to do so. I think we all agree that women are naturally the more loyal of the sexes and its a good thing because if that weren't the case men would be in trouble!

Cupid's Chronicles::Brandon: Fork in the Road.

Long time no write. I still have 'encounters' with "DD" nightly. Lately, she has been spending the night but we arrive to work in seperate cars. Now this works for me but the other day she hinted towards us riding to work together! I don't know how to feel about that 'ish. She is cool and we've been chillin together alot but I'm still skeptical. I just laughed it off like it was a joke but I know that it will come up again and soon. To be honest I would really consider making her more than what she is if we hadn't started off the way we had. I'm thinking I may have to cut this tree from the root....I could use your feedback on this one. Ladies, please don't rip me a new one!!! lol

2 Week Dating Challenge, Part III

We dared you to rev up your love your life the next 2 weeks. We hope you followed our first 3 days, and it is never too late to start. Alright let's continue, ladies and gentlemen take heed:

Day 5: Join a dating connection website.
- No, I promise it is okay! There are an increasing number of people that are signing up. Though some charge a fee it is worth. Isn't it worth investing in your love life and happiness?

Day 6: Be Alone
- Go to a happy hour, dinner, or a social spot alone. That's right I said ALONE! You don't even have to talk to people the first couple of times. Why this works? Well knowing what you like and who you like without any social pressure or peers to sway you to go another way, will help you realize what YOU want. Many of us are unaware of how much weight we put in our friends opinions and judgment, and sometimes with this you could be blocking the love of your life from entering.

Day 7: 3 in 1
- Go on THREE dates in ONE day. One for lunch, happy hour, then dinner... Hey we are all very busy people so utilize your time wisely. You are not tied down to anyone and are trying to meet Mr. Right. You will at least get 3 meals out of it, so that is always a plus.

Day 8: Conventions! Conventions! Conventions!
- Okay what is better than being around 100s of people that have similar interest as you do? There are hundreds of various conventions around the country each year, and there is surely one that you can go to. Conventions bring in a variety of people from all around the country to one central location. I mean, c'mon... it is like a pool of "potentials" in one place just for you!

The Breakdown: What Type of Woman Are You? Introduciing the Controller

Your Love Anthem: "My Way"


THE CONTROLLER

- Is super-responsible, pragmatic and hardworking. Your patience wears thin for men who aren't.
- Expects their men's love to be demonstrated by bowing to their standards, values and expectations.
- Constantly try to convince themselves and others that they aren't manipulative, compulsive or demanding.
- Tend to talk about their emotions rather than expressing them.
-Use silence, withdrawal or departure to punish their man when he fails to do it there way.


(The above is a summarization of page 24 of the book “How to Love a Black Man" by Dr. Ronn Elmore)

Controller: True or Flase coming soon...

The Breakdown: What Type of Woman Are You? Pleaser continued....

Are you a pleaser? CC summarized pages 19-21 of the book "How to Love a Black Man" by Dr. Ronn Elmore. REMINDER: if you answer true to ANY of these, you have ‘pleaser’ tendencies.

True or False.

1. You tend to play a role around men. Making sure to dress, speak and act a certain way that is different from the real you.
2. You do humiliating things to make or keep contact with men. (You have been know to pursue commitment is ways that border on begging)
3. You go out of your way to keep the relationship progressing along so that all he basically has to do is show up.
4. You give up your money, body and tie in way you don't want to but you do it because he wants it.
5. You are constantly thinking of ways to make him more impressed with you.
6. You settle for far less of him than you give out.
7. You know exactly what you want with him but almost never clearly state it.
8. You have become good at justifying, defending and explaining his mistreatment of you.
9. You are comfortable giving love and affection but have hard time accepting his compliments and affection.
10. You let other important areas in your life (friends, health, career) suffer when you are in a relationship.
11. You mood is tied up with his behavior and his mood.
12. You avoid showing negative emotions around him (i.e. anger or jealousy) from fear that he won’t approve.

YOUR PROBLEM: Low self esteem. You feel something is wrong with you when there isn't a Pedestal Man with you.

GIRL TALK

Girl Talk is a new segment that we are introducing to give men a "fly on the wall" perspective into the secret lives of women. CAUTION: these topics may get a little heated & many women won't ever admit to having these thoughts but Cupid's Cousin found a few brave souls who aren't afraid of a little 'girl talk' enjoy...


I was asked by CC to send in a summary of convo's I have with my gal pals ever so often. This opportunity was offered a few weeks ago but lately we haven't been talking about any note worthy topics. When this particular convo got started we knew it was worth mentioning! So, we got on the topic of porn and one of my friends boldly stated that girl-on-girl porn gets her going. I felt the same way but was hesitant to mention it. Long story short, eventually all 6 of us agreed that girl-on-girl porn is a definite turn on! So then the question comes up..."does that mean we're gay?". We all prefer heterosexual relationships but get 'revved up' when seeing two women sexually. We all agree that we have no desire to be in a lesbian relationship but seeing the sex is HOT!!! We are clueless to what this means it's just hilarious that all of us feel the same way and never said anything.

So we ask the ladies, do you all enjoy girl-on-girl porn and what do you think it means?

Cupid's Chronicles::Candice: Drought

This just in on random news at 1:00.....I am so horny!!!! This has been my longest drought season to date. I told myself that I wouldn't partake in casual sex but I don't know if I can hold on! Wouldn't a booty buddy be fitting for my lifestyle? I am young, attractive, well paid but still ambitious. A lady like myself doesn't have time for a relationship I just need a psuedo boyfriend. His responsibility would be to give me affection and orgasms as needed. That sounds way too good to be true....I guess it will be me and my silver bullet until I find a 'no strings attached' situation. BTW I strongly suggest the silver bullet w/remote to all my lustful & lonely ladies!!! Now back to your regularly scheduled program!

Cupid's Proverb

You have to be happy yourself in order to share in other people's happiness.

2 Week Dating Challenge, Part II

We dared you to rev up your love your life the next 2 weeks. We hope you followed our first 3 days, and it is never too late to start. Alright let's continue, ladies and gentlemen take heed:

Day 4: Don't decide for yourself

- Whether checking out the ladies at a party, a club, or online, let your best friend pick the guy/girl you should go for. This works because they may select someone you'd never even consider, and sometimes the person you don't think is your type is the best one for you.

Day 5: Get out of town

- Traveling or business? Hit a happy hour in a commercial district or a hotel bar that's popular with the locals. On a solo vacation? Dine in restaurants where you can eat at a bar or there's open seating to up your chances of rubbing elbows with the single somebody. This works because travel broadens your horizons, this automatically making you more open to new possibilities and best of all people. Leave your comfort zone and you will be more receptive to the people you meet.

Day 6: Seek spiritual guidance

- Whatever your religious beliefs, seek an unusual but excellent resource.... that's right go to your Pastor, Minister, Rabbi, or whom ever! Well if you think about it they know everyone in their church and have an excellent perspective on all the members.

Day 7, 8, 9 coming November 11th

*CC would like ot thank Essence Magazine February 2007 issue for some of these helpful tips idea!

Cupid's Chronicles: Alex:: Have my cake and eat it too!!! mmmm

Hey blog world. Well let me catch you up if you do not already know. My name is Alex, I have a boyfriend of 7 years. He is great. I got bored and cheated with my ex-boyfriend. Last time I left you guys I was feeling bad and depressed. Wellll.... things have changed. I'm officially having an "affair" with my ex. We have been on a few dates and he is so fun. I swear I can laugh and just act like myself around him. He is thoughtful and listens, and best of all he knows I am involved.

I know you all are like "why don't you break it off with your current boyfriend?", well if it was that simple I would. My boyfriend is caring, committed BUT boring. He doesn't allow me to let go and be free, and when I do he looks at me with disgust and confusion. I mean we use to do all that, but now he is simply boring. PLUS, and a big plus is...... (click "read more" for the juice)

2 Week Dating Challenge

We dare you to rev up your love your life the next 2 weeks. Take our advice for the next 14 days and you will learn how to get your mate's attention! So ladies and gentlemen take heed:

Day 1: Get 5 friends to hook you up.
- Put out a dating SOS to all your friends telling them you would like to be set up. Why does this work? Well who knows you best?... That's right your friends. Chances are you will at least have a good time and find someone you are compatible with

Day 2: Just ask him out, already!
- There is always that one guy you have been checking out. Give him a smile and ask him if he'd like to have dinner. THAT'S RIGHT LADIES, you ask them out! This works because he might accept, The End!

Day 3: Flirt with the people you are NOT interested in.
- Touch the postman's shoulder and thank him for doing such a good job. Tell the cab driver this is the smoothest ride you've had all week, or mention to the 411 operator that you think she has a great voice. Why, you may ask? Well practice makes perfect, and you'll want to be adept at flirting when that sexy lady walks into your life.

Day 4, 5, 6 coming November 8th

*CC would like ot thank Essence Magazine February 2007 issue for some of these helpful tips idea!

To Shack or not to Shack????

Is living together still taboo?

She was nervous.
He was divorced.

They loved each other, but is right now the right time to move in together? Could they overlook the sex issue due to their religious beliefs? Would the relationship last?


This has long been a taboo subject, the issue of sex and living together before marriage. There are 3 issues CC will address and we would love to hear your thoughts:


1. The Contract: Just think about it you, a single 27 year old female, are just finally finding your independence, and you just found the right color paint for your living room decor. Your boyfriend proposes that you two live together to save money and spend quality time together. Makes sense right?
Well we all have seen it before...2 lovers move in... invest together...buy new furniture TOGETHER...then BAM! They break up and now they have all these things they have to split. Well save all that drama and agree on a cohabitation contract before moving. It gives you peace of mind and saves you the DRAMA.

Click "Read More" for the rest

What Women Hate in Bed!!!

The men voiced their grievances and now the women bite back! CC spoke with a panel of beauties to investigate what women hate in bed!

-I'M ON TO YOU: Women say they can tell when you're "going down" simply as a tool to get her lubricated vs doing it because you enjoy pleasuring her. Get into it guys!!!!
-YOU'RE SO SELFISH: Ladies are frustrated with men having all the fun! If she doesn't climax through intercourse, find another way to take her there!
-SO PREDICTABLE: Is there a mandetory "foreplay" (or lack there of) class that all men take? More times than not men follow the same path time and time again! KISS-NECK-BREAST-ORAL-PENETRATION. Women can see these predictable steps from a mile away! They demand a change!!!
-PORN OBSESSED: This goes to all those over zealous porn collectors! Women ask that you please stop targeting the uterus! It hurts! Have you seen the anatomy of a porn star? Waaaayyy Different. In this case art doesn't always imitate life!!!
-BE GENTLE: When licking or touching the clitorous pressure is the key! If your finger or tougue applies too much pressure you will definitely make her squirm but not in the way you'd like to believe! Her flower is delicate. Treat it as such!
-TRUTH HURTS: Women want to let men know that they do fake it ALOT! 9 times out of 10 the sex is just blah. You think you're doing so well and they just don't have the heart to break it to you!