Monday, October 12, 2009

Cupid's Chronicles:: Alex: Was lust worth it?

Damn! ... is all I have to say. I met my ex for lunch... and let's just say I had more than lunch on the menu. Yeah we had sex and it was so passionate and lustful and good, BUT it was in my car. During it, I didn't care; I just wanted him so bad. Let's just say the lust was the only thing fueling my mind.

Wham Bam and 20 minutes later... we were done. Time to go… and all I could say was "thanks".... wtf?

Driving back home I put it on 102.1 and my heart was beating with music. But this was not the heart beat of love... it was the heartbeat of shame. I felt like throwing up right there in my car on the freeway. The rain began to pour down and the sky was grey ... and right then I felt like I sold my soul for lust, for those 20 minutes of passion. My hand was on the steering wheel and I couldn’t stop shaking. No tears though, no crying... just one simple thing, GUILT!

Well I got my I wish I only had the love of my boyfriend.

What am I suppose to do, go home and kiss him? That's I took the coke I had in my car spilled it all over my lap, so when I walked in I had an excuse to go straight to bathroom and take a shower, hoping the water will cleanse the shame.

1 comment:

  1. Pinky and the BrainOctober 21, 2009 at 5:16 PM

    Obviously not. Alex you need Jesus